The Attachment Link, Part 1

I’m about to throw a LOT of information at you.  I’m actually going to break it up into multiple posts, to make it easier.  We’ll see if it takes 2 or 3. Try to bear with me, because I really think this stuff is vitally important. And if you disagree, I am certainly open to ...

Things That Will Keep You From Healing

Based on the chart I posted in my last blog post, I started thinking about some of these things, and figured I’d share it. This is a tricky post to get right, because the tone makes all the difference.  I want you to understand that I am only writing these things to HELP…not hurt, or ...

Deep Inner Decisions that Allow Survivors to Heal

This is a chart by Ellen Lacter that I found on this website, which all survivors should read WITH CAUTION. POTENTIALLY TRIGGERING MATERIAL.  I thought this chart was so helpful that I printed it and taped it to my bathroom mirror.  As I run through the checklist here, I can easily identify some areas where ...

About Integration

I have written about integration a little bit on my website, but I thought I would re-visit it here, just for kicks. The American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, in their article about D.I.D., says: “The main goal for treatment is the integration of the separate personality states into one cohesive, unified personality…”  In ...

J8’s Take on “The Myth of Sanity”

The Myth of Sanity (by Martha Stout) – my own review I want to make it clear before I start writing that disagreement can be respectful, and that’s always how I intend to be. Nothing I’m about to say is meant to disrespect anyone else in any way. I have a different opinion (what else is ...

Guest Post – Chloe

This probably needs a TRIGGER WARNING, even though we always try to keep things unspecific.  (S)RA/MC is mentioned in this post, as is Freemas*nry, pr*gramming, s*icide, and s*lf-m*tilation, etc.  If these words are problematic for you, be cautious or feel free to navigate away from this post.  If you are okay with reading/seeing those words, ...

Working With Multiple Systems

These are just some thoughts off the top of my head, as to how to work with a multiple and their system.  I’m writing this for therapists, counselors, and/or anyone else (even friends) who attempts to relate to or work with a multiple and their system.  As always, this is not meant to be exhaustive, and ...

Double Binds

**TW**  Some mild discussion of ritual abuse is included in this post.  I have made it generic.  But read with caution, if you are a survivor and/or are not in a good place emotionally.                               Double binds are something that everyone ...

Trauma-Based Mind Control **TW**

TRIGGER WARNING:  I have specifically made this blog a place where very few graphic details have or will ever be discussed, and this post is no exception. HOWEVER. Some people find that even certain words can be problematic.  This is a post where that may be the case.  I have not included ANY graphic details ...

Why I Write

I’m working on a post for later today, but I wanted to take a minute and ask a favor from all who have read my blog.  If you have found it useful, enjoyable, relevant to you or someone you know, or informative (or all 4! woohoo!), can you please take a minute and “Like” the ...

Types of Inside People

Someone recently asked me if I could write about a certain type of inside person, because they wanted information about it, so in keeping with this request, I am going to babble about this subject for a bit.  I have provided plenty of links within this post if you want to know more people’s opinions ...

Some Resources

Hey everybody, I am about to have oral surgery tomorrow, and most likely won’t feel like writing for a few days.  But I did want to pause and extend some resources for those who might be interested in some of the same types of stuff that I have found helpful. NOTE:  The majority of these ...

Living Life With an SRA Survivor

I realize it might be a little absurd for me, the survivor, to write about what it’s like being friends with a survivor.  I’ve never walked a mile in those shoes…at least, not yet.  But I HAVE learned some things, most of them learned the hard way.  I’ve walked through misunderstandings, rejections, unfair judgments, and ...

Interlude

I don’t want to disappoint anyone who has recently started following this blog by not posting anything, but y’all, I’m exhausted.  It’s been a tough week and I have some chronic pain issues that never really go away for any considerable length of time.  I am regularly faced with the difficult decision as to whether ...

The Ritual Aspect of RA

I have intentionally tried to keep this blog, as well as my website, as generic and as trigger-less as possible.  However, it’s impossible for me to know or avoid every trigger that every reader might have.  Everyone is unique and their stories are specific to them. I want to write a post soon about being ...

Object Constancy

I really, really don’t want my blog to read like a cheap psychology journal.  It probably does, but that’s not my intent.  I do think psychology comes into play with D.I.D., but I don’t think psychology itself is the answer to life’s problems.  I believe Jesus is the answer, and has the answers.  He knows ...

“False” Memories

I have mentioned in passing that I doubt even the validity of my own “memories,” for various reasons that are too significant to overlook.  I’m not sure if I can concisely explain why, but here’s the best I can do.  I have no answers…only questions. The biggest reason I doubt is this: other than the ...

Things We Want People to Know

Here are some things that we have commonly heard and feel the need to speak about. Just because we are displaying an emotion you don’t usually see, doesn’t mean we’ve switched.  My system is particularly shy about being seen when we come and go.  We can do it very, very quickly but if we think ...